January 18, 2020 … February 5, 2020

Saturday, January 18, 2020, 11:00 AM :  I was talking on the phone to our cousin; got up out of my chair; fell straight forward hitting my chin and the right side of my face by my right eye.   I am sitting on the floor … blood all over me and all over the floor.    Found my call…button … pushed it.  Staff came in … they called Craig … put a band-aid on my chin to catch the blood … then a piece of folded cloth … with tape at the ends;  that sort of kept the blood off things.  I found out that there are many blood vessels in the face ,,, and thus the heavy load of blood flowing everywhere,

Emergency room:   It is so cold.  I am guessing that within the next 3-4 hours they put an IV in my left arm … someone did.  I remember telling each nurse trying to put the IV in that they have two chances … and that is all for them.   First nurse took her two chances and could not get the IV positioned.  Next nurse:  now a male nurse that knew he did not have to use x-rays to position the IV … two chances for this nurse.   Note:  we ARE NOW FOUR ATTEMPTS!!!  A third nurse:   makes it on one attempt.   I do not remember male or female … whatever.   I have 5 … five … clear needle attempts in my left arm!!!   I do have the IV in.

Hospital Room:  Some time in the next hours … they somehow find out that I have blood clots in both lungs and am being admitted as a patient.   All I remember is being in the hospital room and being put on this “heparin” to begin to get rid of the blood clots … of course using the IV.   Craig waits with me for a room … he goes home during that time and comes back when they have me in the hos[ital room … bringing a change of clothes and my face-washing stuff!!!   (Craig had been suggesting I get a small bag together with what I would need in a hospital trip.  Of course, I had not done that at that time … but I assure you I have a hospital bag ready now!!! )   Oh … the hospital room was very cold!!!

Hospital room … Continued:  Monday. January 27th … late afternoon … I am told that I can go home that evening.   I went off the Heparin sometime that Monday and I was switched to a blood-thinner … maybe that was Sunday … I think they wanted me on the blood…thinner 24 hours before I left.  I showed the worst of myself when a rep of the oxygen supply insisted I have a third canister to go from the hospital to my apartment ,,, probably a 5-minute ride … I knew I would not hook myself up to that plastic cord for that little time … and of course I did not!!!

Now …     I am on oxygen 24/7 … really about 22/7.   I have a horrible runny nose … I am guessing from a cold I caught at the hospital.   I have this oxygen tube in my nose the 22 – 24 hours daily … which causes my nose to be irritated … and more runny nose … if such is possible!!!   I am doing my walking … trying to get it back up … I was at 2400 feet daily when all this happened … I am back to 1600  feet daily … did it with my oxygen today.   I have had two nose treatments during this time … the skin on the tip of my nose has come off ,,, the nose is definitely red … and my runny nose is not helping my nose either!!!   I was beginning to think that I could take care of myself in an independent situation … and then this!!!  I am so thankful I was here.  Sitting on the floor with blood running down my clothes and all over the floor … and people came immediately!!!

A white-out!!!  There is a part to this story that I have told only a couple people.  I am telling it now.  As people were trying to find out what had happened … remember,  I was sitting on the floor in this blood as the staff came in,,, a few of the people asked me if I had had a black-out?”  I had not … but what happened as soon as I fell if not passing out??  I remember distinctly my fall … everything is white … I am standing where I was before falling … I see a white blur that falls to the floor … I see myself form a white image of my sitting down ... I see myself in the white image … no longer standing beside my fall but being my fall.   That is what happened as I fell and, then, got into a sitting position!!! 

I am OK: It is Wednesday, February 5 … 2020.  I am on oxygen … and trying to get better at my walking.

Love y’all.



This is a very emotional time of life!!

It really is.  I would never have described it as such … until these past days …tried to arrange for Erin … a granddaughter … to visit; when walking yesterday, a dear friend, here, sort of lost her legs while coming to walk with me;  i need information on what is medically a plan for my right knee … and for my left knee;  Craig is attending the Joint Mathematics Meeting … held annually at this time of the year … and coincidentally being held in Denver this year;  Craig will be teaching 16 hours this coming semester … 8 hours college algebra, 3 hours of trig, and 5 hours of calculus I; (memories!!!); my cancer on my nose has had three treatments … fourth tomorrow … some reddish irritation is appearing at the end of my nose … I am going to take pictures weekly so I have a record;  I have done my 2400 feet of walking for today; Craig put a television in this room that I use as an office ... three televisions in this little apartment!!;  the lady whose legs gave out two days ago passed away … her husband knocked on my door this morning to tell me such … we did a cup of coffee and an hour and a half of memories; we all have such similar milestones; I should have washed my hair today … had it on my calendar and just did not want to; one of the bridge players … my 101 year-old-friend … the best bridge player in this building … has been in poor shape medically … she was given the wrong medicine … came out of that … only to fall and break her leg … she may be back here for rehab … but more likely help and leg healing as is; we have a new resident who is here because of physical shape … brain cancer affecting his right side … but excellent mentally !!; I have the afternoon “Let’s Make a Deal” on the television … and I am watching it!!!; it is too loud;  I still have my Christmas decorations up … we took down the wreath on the entry door … but everything is still up!  I love it;  except for removing his things, everything in Pete’s room is the same as when he was using it … Craig has suggested a new mattress … and I am thinking of new colors, too; I am really not using his bedroom … but I think I should open it up with new colors and such … and I thinking of yellow, gray, and black;  I am not in the mood for a geometric pattern on the bed … but flowers would be too much … we shall see what Amazon has!!!

Reader:  You do realize you are getting a brain dump … it is certainly beneficial to me!!!

What else???  I am drinking too much coffee;  Craig bought me one of those one cup Keurig coffee makers … I think somewhere in this writing … a long time ago … I have mentioned how I love it!!! I did not send Christmas greetings this past 2019 … I am hoping I can get a couple more friends on my reading list for this BLOG … so we can stay in touch … I do not want to lose contact with past students and friends who were on my Christmas list; this is mid January … and Denver … city … has temperature around 50 degrees during the middle of the day … it is wonderful; I did something on the computer a little while ago that keeps the collection of pictures in the computer on the screen whenever I am not using another file on the computer … so whenever I walk into my office I see pictures through about 2003 until around 2017 … the pictures are lovely … there are so many of Pete!!!  Switched the television to a sport’s talk program … they are discussing what the football team for LSU and others will look like after the current football players leave for the NFL … it does appear that many college football players are opting for the NFL.  It does appear to me that there is considerable support for Alabama to be the team to beat!!!  There is also support for Clemson … it appears Trever Lawrence may be returning.

Love y’all…

The SAINTS Lost!!!

 I cannot believe the Saints lost!!!  One more tie with New Orleans erased from my life now!!!  I know that sounds very dramatic … but when you know that it is just memories that tie you to something, you stretch those memories.   I had been holding tightly to my Saints … wearing my SAINTS shirt every Sunday … or Monday.   I liked to remember when they won the Super Bowl … I was still teaching at Southeastern  … and just could not believe we won the SUPER BOWL!!!   The memories are good.   Of course I remember the Quarter with Pete … grad school, Mardi Gras, the restaurants … the restaurant on the corner that did a great Beef-Po-Boy for Pete and a great Muffaletta for me.   I am remembering more than I had thought!!!

Letting memories guide me … I am reminded of a wonderful womanEdna … who passed away this past January 1st.   Edna was 98 years old … and when I knew her … a more self – sufficient person you would never find … and so lovely, and helpful to everyone … Edna checked every day on my mother.    I remember “Blan-chee,  are you there?”  We loved Edna.

This past week-end will stay in my mind!!!  For the entire Friday, Saturday, Sunday … and, I hear, this Monday, also, the residents of this assisted-living complex are requested to stay in their apartments.  There are cases of a “neuro-virus” among the population here … and among the “Memory Care” population.

Time off … it is now Monday afternoon … and this “quarantine” has been continued until this coming Wednesday … the 8th … after breakfast.   Already, I know I have gained weight!!  I had football to watch this week-end … but after tonight … nothing!!!   whatever!!!!  I have my glass of wine … and I will do something to fill my time

Of course … I have my first radiation treatment tomorrow … morning.   That gives me an excuse to sit in my chair and feel sorry for myself!!!   This “quarantine” is excuse enough!   (I have to watch my bold and such … it can carry past my use.)

Love y’all

8 Hours … 9 minutes … left of 2019!

21 minutes until our “New Year’s Eve” Happy Hour.    Trying to put a “shell” around the year of 2019 is just impossible.   Immediately, Pete’s passing comes to mind.   There is nothing left in 2019 that matches that !!!   I have tried to stay away from Pete’s passing as I write this BLOG.   Once his passing enters my mind, all else is dull.   I find myself stopped at the stage of being ready to share something with him and knowing that he is not here.  It is “OK” … not really!!!   But I certainly cannot change it.

8 minutes to our “happy hour.” ... glass of wine and snacks … the snacks are fixed by the kitchen and are really quite nice.

2020:  Dentist Thursday, Jan 2nd … tooth pulled to prevent future problems … at my age, I wonder about such!!!   But (three) dentists and Craig say we should do that.   Maybe too much consulting!!!   Tuesday, Jan 9th … I have my first radiation treatment on the Cancer at the tip of my nose.   

(Back to my BLOG … from our NYE Happy Hour!!!)

Yes … the Cancer on the tip of my nose … this phrase sounds like what a writer would create as a  storyline so there is no fear raised in the reader!!!   From someone who does have a Cancer at the tip of her nose … it seems true and totally ridiculous … I feel like a joke when I say the phrase:  cancer on the tip of my nose.

The guess is that I should need 7 to 8 treatments … two a week!!!

I am thinking January for the treatments;  February for my nose to heal … when the treatments stop,  the cancer finishes its healing from the inside.   I am thinking end of February for the healing.   Our family “senior” reunion… could then be around the end of February.   I would then have my right knee replaced … with my left knee replacement next!!!   The knee replacements’ schedule is all speculative ,,, my hip doctor also does knees, so I will use him for my knees … my left hip is great.

At this current time, I have no big occasions in my mind.  We shall just have to see … I think of all of you from Louisiana and Webster so much … and miss you!!! I am wishing all of you a most lovely and blessed 2020 …  make it healthy and joyful, also!!! 

Love y.all … and Happy New Year …

                      (6 hours and 41 minutes of 2019 still with us!!!)

A Most Blessed Person … I Am.

When I thought of starting this essay … the title just came out.   And the rich memories have just filled me ... memories … in a minute … but, now, a “telling” of how my great day started.  Craig and I went to TARGET!!!    Now, for a few of my sophisticated readers, this may not deserve CAPS, and BOLD, and ITALICS.   I do not think I have been to Target … much less shopping … for a long time … and with Craig!   Usually Craig gets me whatever I need … or I order from Amazon.   It was a total delight to walk the Target ailes — no matter what lists I write for Craig, I always forget something … a “cucumber – mint” sparking water,  a “grapefruit”  sparking water,  “plain” hummus,  “cuties” … cross between satsumas and tangerines!!!  Craig and I returned to the apartment … and decided to have Christmas then.   (Just filled my second glass of wine while writing this essay … a really fine Cabernet from my brother — with pieces of the “Cuties” for even more smiles — my smiles!!!) 

So, Craig and I did Christmas this morning.   It was wonderful … he was a better Santa then I was!!!  I have a beautiful bracelet … Craig has my style … always from Art Shows here — and simple and beautiful.  I showed a picture of the bracelet last year — I will try to get this one shown by picture.   Craig managed also to find me a multitude of the ribbons I wear in my hair — and a darling mirror and plaque for my living room … I will smile every time I walk by it.   As I said, I did not do that well for him … we shall see.

The memories … a student I loved dearly … who is not with us … a letter from her parents … a reason to believe and be thankful; a friend from the lake … how I miss the lake!!! … and the people;  a beautiful math/computer science major at Southern Illinois … whose oldest child is entering college; and  my lovely and beautiful roommate from my college years.

And … new memories … at least, the people involved are from this where-abouts.

New memories:   a lovely woman and her friend … whom I met here … and who brought me candy last night at dinner … how thoughtful … she knew I would cherish the thought.

Did my 2400 feet today — and stopped in and visited a friend at turn 2300!!!  One of our fabulous bridge players who has not been feeling well.  She is 101 years old and is probably our best bridge player here.   She just had not been feeling well … and it is not like her.  I pass her apartment as I walk … we had a good visit … they changed her medicine, and she is much better … and going to grandchildren for dinner today — and another group from family from dinner tomorrow.   That is good.

Tomorrow … dinner out at the home of a friend and her son.  Her son is the “handsome” man who is my driver so often … and she is … I consider her a friend … so wonderful to have at this stage of being away from ones who were … and are … friends.  I could not convince her that I wanted to do something  to help with dinner … so wine, cookies, and candies!!!    I am looking so forward to the time spent with them.

The best of all my wishes to family and friends … have a wonderful holiday!!!

Love y’all .


Happy Holidays!

Can’t find the perfect “place” from which to start this essay!!!   I love y’all who are with me in this BLOG … friends and family who use this BLOG as a way for us to stay in touch.  What does it mean to “celebrate” a Holiday … a Christmas!!!  Thanks to Craig, there is a small little tree in my office … and two presents under it!!!   Stephie gave me the tree the first Christmas Pete and I were in Denver.  The Memories!!!   Early Christmases!!!   I am trying to remember how we celebrated Christmas when Lori and Craig were young.  I know we opened presents on Christmas Morning.   I am guessing that Pete cooked the Christmas Dinner … I am thinking that we might have spent Christmases with my mother … and with my sister and her family.   I don’t remember … it has all blended together without dates!!!  

Christmases changed after the grandchildren came … at first Pete and I stayed with Lori and her family over the Christmas visit.   In 2003, Pete bought the place in Wisconsin … on Bonner Lake.   Since I had about mid-December to mid-January as my vacation, it became our practice to spend that time in Wisconsin (at the lake!!!) ... and visit Lori and the grands when it was good.  I am remembering my starting the habit of one day per grand-child … at the Mall of America … buying whatever they wanted.   This habit started early when I realized that I did not know enough about what each would want.   I remember the scenes of each of the children trying on clothes, choosing lunch … always that restaurant with all the fish and animals.   I loved it — it was my Christmas gift from the grandchildren!!!


Christmas, 2017, we are in Denver!!!  Pete was not comfortable going out … so we ate Christmas dinner in the dining room in the Assisted Living complex … and the day after Christmas, Craig and Stephie would bring over a full course Christmas dinner.  This year I will eat dinner in our dining room … and I am sure Craig and I will do an appropriate dinner later.   We must allow time on Christmas to open presents … I surely hope Craig’s come in time.  Love y’all … enjoy time with family and friends … good memories … 

Love y’all … Happy Holidays

I Added 400!!

Sometime last week I added 400 ft to my daily walking!!!  That means another walk from my apartment door to the end of the hallway and back to my apartment door — 200 feet from my apartment door to the end of the hallway!!!   So I am now at 12 “laps.”   A lap is from my apartment door or back!!!   OR .4124  (rounded up)  of a mile!!!   And I am sure I could continue this paragraph to the disdane of any readers!!!

As I sat down to write this essay … I began an outline of what has happened this month — and I cannot believe that it has been a month since I wrote in this BLOG!!!

One of the best ... a visit from Brenna … granddaughter!!!   She has a friend in Golden (Colorado) … Brenna stayed with her — and we visited quite a bit..   On the Friday —Craig drove Brenna and me up to Boulder — home of University of Colorado — Brenna was interested in a grad school that would get her a degree in family care … I am sure I messed up the name of the degree, but you get the idea!!!   It does happen that she could be in the area a few summers … I, of course, smiled!!!

Sunday Brenna, friend, and I did a brunch at one of my favorite such places in Denver — we walked through Golden — and I got home early afternoon … just in time for more football games.

Of course, Stephie in, is another one of the best here for me.   She got in really late Monday night … and Tuesday was probably the worst snow day Denver has had this year.   We had one item on the agenda for Wednesday when Stephie was here … get my glasses.   With my cataracts removed and the glaucoma, I needed a new pair of glasses … really both near and far “tweeked.”   We went to a really neat place downtown … Stephie did some work while we shopped for “office” glasses and “sun” glasses.   Craig was a suberb help…

Since we were downtown we went to one of Craig’s and Stephanie’s favorite restaurants down town…Motto: “ if you do not like garlic, do not come here.”   Seriously … and the food was so good … not “garliky” but GOOD!!!!

Next day was Thanksgiving … Craig and Stephanie were doing the dinner … and I went to Craig’s house sort of mid-afternoon … sat and watched football and got to know the cats!!!   The cats are darling … there are four of them … well behaved, beautiful, big, hair about 2 inches long, well-groomed … they are called “ragdolls”.. I really liked them!!!  Dinner was great … the turkey was perfect … Craig cooked it upside down … like his father always did … but I don’t think Craig remembered that far back!!!   The side dishes were really great also … a new corn dish …superb … I can’t wait until next Thanksgiving!!!  Also had dressing, gravy, sweet potato casserole, green bean casserole, rolls … and Craig baked a really good pecan pie the next day!!!

Stephie left late Saturday night … so we did the last couple days doing anything she wanted to get done while here.

Life, this week, has returned to normal … I was ready to write “boring” … but really not.   Saturday and Sunday are watching football;   Monday and Wednesday are write on this BLOG, wash hair, and … I am sure … other things.  Tuesday morning is bridge… This coming Friday is Bridge morning … four of us have merged so nicely into a group that likes to play bridge together.   They played in my room last time … I will see what they want to do this Saturday.

The Monet showing is here … I saw it on Friday, the 8th of November and … again on the 15th.  The 8th was sponsored by St. Louis University … but turned out to be just a viewing of the paintings alone.   I had thought it would be a session on Monet.   I did enjoy the second viewing — with Craig.   It was so wonderful to see such a collection of Monet’s paintings ,,, and discuss them afterwards.  I found out I really like one of Monet’s paintings of poplars.   Jim’s mother, Kay, went with me for the first viewing … it is wonderful to have someone outside my usual circle.

Finished my glass of wine … and finished my notes … maybe should mention we are investigating how best to handle the cancer on the tip of my nose.   Thanks to family, we have two doctors who do the radiation romoval of a cancer.  We will listen to both … and I am trying to get in touch with the one doctor who did Craig’s MOHS on his nose!!!

It is a dreary evening …expecting some rain and snow.

Love y’all …